Recently, I saw a hilarious announcement: the owner of a company had a big plan! He was dressing up as Willy Wonka (complete with purple top hat and floppy golden bow tie) and had a handful of “Golden Tickets” which gave the recipient free goods and bonus just-released items. He was going to put the tickets randomly in various orders that were made that day. It was such a creative way to encourage business!

Although you probably already know about Willy Wonka, the reference is from a children’s book by Roald Dahl, “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory”. It is a fantastical, imaginative tale about a young boy from a very poor family who finds a golden ticket in a chocolate bar. The ticket grants the bearer a special tour of an amazing and mysterious candy factory run and owned by the eccentric millionaire Willy Wonka. There are only five tickets hidden in specific chocolate bar wrappers, and are greatly coveted and sought after by thousands of young hopefuls.

The five children who win the Golden Tickets and arrive for the tour later discover that they are the five candidates for Willy Wonka’s replacement – he wants to retire and the tour is in actuality a sort of interview to determine who the next owner of the factory will be. Only one can emerge the new heir, and the series of events in the chocolate factory tour show that it will need to be a very uniquely qualified person indeed.

Who doesn’t love the idea of winning a “Golden Ticket”?

Especially if it was unexpected and entirely unmerited through your own effort or talent!

Going from a gritty and gray daily grind to suddenly having an entirely new opportunity that includes joy, creativity, pleasure, authority, and wealth – what an incredible prospect!

So guess what? 

To anyone who is a follower of Christ, you are the winner of a Golden Ticket!

Granted sudden and immediate access to God through Jesus’ sacrifice, you’re invited into the Kingdom. And not only as a tourist or a day-visitor: You have been invited to become part of God’s Kingdom operations – given the work of growing and furthering it (Daniel 7:18).

And it wasn’t random chance that you received this ticket. Nope! You were hand-selected by God, chosen and called (Ephesians 1:4), because He sees you, knows you, and loves you. And He wanted you to be the one specifically in charge of the work He prepared for you before time began (Ephesians 2:10).

This Kingdom work is so multi-faceted and so greatly varied that there is plenty of space for everyone who is called to have their own particular area of operations. For me right now, this means taking a good hard look at the roles I have currently been given (mama and wife, homemaker, teacher/mentor, friend…) then, with passion, focus, and humility, getting up each day to fill those roles with all the strength and ability He helps me to have. 

What roles and what work have been assigned to you in this time? Whatever it is, be encouraged to do it with all your strength (Ecclesiastes 9:10), knowing that you’ll be giving a project report on it at some point (Hebrews 4:13).

There is a brighter time coming, when we will reign with Him (2 Timothy 2:12, Romans 8:17). For right now, it’s like the part where we are faithfully learning and training as apprentices or interns. So we must not lose heart, even when it seems like the gray and the grit of our current circumstances are more real than the fact of a gleaming Golden Ticket in our hand.

Each person who won a Golden Ticket didn’t automatically receive the right to ownership of the Chocolate Factory – they had to act on the promise it gave, and show up on the appointed day to be allowed inside!

We can hold onto the same hope – knowing that the gate will swing open for us and we will be welcomed in, for we have been given a hope that is certain:

Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise. (Hebrews 10:23, NLT)

Can’t wait to be heirs of the “Chocolate Factory” with you, my friend!

– Maria

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Sometimes it’s hard to enjoy your children

It can be a struggle to enjoy your little children when you’re feeling overwhelmed.  A season of illness, a new baby, a husband who travels, school starting, or any disruption can start of cycle of overwhelming feelings. 

When we’re overwhelmed and exhausted, it becomes really hard to think clearly; and when we’re overwhelmed and not thinking clearly, we can’t give our children our best. 

In those days of overwhelm, we stop seeing the joy in life. Then the children start behaving in reaction to your negative emotions, and a terrible cycle develops. To help you, I’m going to give some concrete ideas on how to stop the overwhelming whirlpool that is sucking the joy out of life.

Create a daily routine to enjoy your children

To start, I want to emphasize that it’s really important to keep a consistent daily and weekly routine for your children.  Having a routine provides expectations and boundaries in the day and that gives them security. 

Children thrive in secure environments.  They like to know what to expect and when to expect it.  We all do!  It’s what gives that feeling of relief and satisfaction when coming home from a long trip, even though the trip was probably a fun vacation.  Aim for a consistent daily routine.

On your own with your children?

Does your husband travel for work or does he have an erratic work schedule?  Mine did for many years, so I understand how hard it is not to have someone to depend on.  Those years were hard.  You may find yourself wondering how to enjoy your children.

I was alone with kids all day and night.  I had little children, a lot of them, and I had to come up with systems and strategies to cope.  That’s what I write about here and in my book.  It’s what I fill the Free Resource Library with. 

I had a deep desire to create a beautiful life for my children, and that took thoughtful effort.  I didn’t do everything perfect and I learned a lot of hard lessons, but I did the best I could with the knowledge I had at the time. 

Hopefully, you’ll find something here that will add to your knowledge bank so you can create better days for you and your family.

Survival tactics

I don’t want you to feel overwhelmed with the following strategies, just add one idea at a time.  Once you have it established and consistent, add another idea. Just taking small steps to re-learn how to enjoy your children.

Create good habits with your children

• Have a consistent bedtime routine that starts at the exact same time every evening. Give the children a 10 minute heads-up before  it starts. Bathe or wash-up, pajamas, brush teeth, drink, then story time and a song. Pray with them. Give hugs and kisses, say good night. Important: do the exact same bedtime routine every night.

• Bedtime stories: one picture book that they choose and one Bible story.  Not an endless stack of books, just two stories.

• Have a consistent morning routine for the children. Have breakfast at a certain time. Say “Good morning” to each one with a happy voice and give each one a hug. Nobody wants to wake up to a barking voice or “Hey, get up and get moving.”  Greet them with a smile and cheer, even if they wake up grumpy.

Structure your days

Structured days are a great step towards learning how to enjoy your children

• Have regular meal and snack times of healthy foods. Feed them every 2-3 hours. Thank God before each meal/snack. Say a short and sweet prayer, a memorized prayer, or a song prayer. Hungry children will have behavior problems, so will moms.  Remember to eat regularly, every 2-3 hours.

•   Every morning have a teaching time when you choose a book and activity to do together. Make it fun! Take pictures of your fun to remember later. 

• Have a naptime / Quiet Hour every afternoon right after lunch Table Chores. Snuggle on the couch and read one or two stories before naptime.

• Have a Read Aloud Time every day, choose a chapter book that would be interesting to them. They can play quietly while you read, color, or snuggle but ask them to be quiet while you read. Stop occasionally and ask them to say back what you read or retell the story. This helps build their listening skills which will help with so many other areas of life.

Play

• Give them free play every day: but not a free-for-all the whole day. Make sure your children have open ended imaginative toys. Melissa and Doug, Montessori, and the like. Remove all noise makers unless they add significant value (this is for your sanity). There are great options that create imaginative play that grows their minds and keeps them busy with stimulating activity for long periods of time.

• Every day play outside: in your yard, go to a park, and/or go for a nature walk. Do something outside for at least one hour every day. You can split it between morning and afternoon. Show them the beauty of creation. Get a bird guide, a tree guide, etc. There is a beautiful world to explore, start showing it to them.  There is science behind all the benefits of being in nature for children and adults.

• Put a time in your day for playing with puzzles or art. Or Sit Time where each child goes to a specific spot with a stack of age appropriate books for a certain amount of age appropriate minutes. Use a specific playlist for these times of day.  Playlists invoke a mood, quiet music for quiet times like puzzles and art. Cheery up-beat music for Afternoon Chore Time.

• Evening: play games, play outside, read stories, take a walk. Live deliberately, if Dad is there in the evening, do something enjoyable to build that connection.

Chores

• Give children table chores. I.e. Put dishes in the dishwasher, wipe the table, sweep under the table. Thank them for their help, give praise. We all eat, chores give purpose and value to both the food prep and the effort it takes to create meals.  Make them an event and have your children help.  Even little children can help; in fact, preschoolers are great helpers in the kitchen!

• Have a toy pick-up before lunch. It should take 10 minutes or less. If it takes longer then there are too many toys out. Use a 10 minute music playlist, the same one every day, for toy pick-up. You could also use a kitchen timer but a playlist is more pleasant.  Choose cheerful songs.  You’ll have to help them and show them how to pick-up.  Teach them also to put a toy away when they are finished playing with it.  Having certain locations for certain toys helps them learn orderliness.  “Everything has a place, everything in its place.”

• Hold a daily Afternoon Chore Time: basic cleaning chores. Get a small broom and dust pan, a feather duster, dish pans or small baskets for toting clean laundry. Invite your children into your work. Give them praise and say thank you! Give them hugs.

• Assign a kitchen helper for each day. When you are working in the kitchen, have that child assist. Get a child sized spoon, a chef hat, make it fun.

Be Intentional about your attitude

• Name five things you love about each child. Write it on a list. Read it every day.  Look for positive aspects about each child and tell them, encourage them.  “You were so kind when you ______” and a hug is a more beneficial approach than scolding them for unkind behavior.

• Teach them to love each other. “We are a family, we love each other, we take care of each other, we help each other.” Show them what that means, demonstrate it, talk about it.  “You saw that _____ needed help and you helped her!  Good job loving your sister!” Don’t allow them to treat anyone in the family as a burden.  Set the example, “Oh, the baby is crying, let’s help him!”

• Don’t allow name calling from anyone. Always use encouraging words that build up.

• Pray for each child specifically. For their day and night, their future, their faith, their spouse who is your future son or daughter-in-law, their struggles, everything. Pray all the time for your children. God is always with you and his mercies are everlasting. He gives wisdom to those who ask, so ask him all the time for wisdom in loving and caring for your children. The joy of the Lord is your strength!

Take care of yourself.

• Get healthy, eat the colors of the rainbow, cut out sugar, drink water, walk or exercise every day. All those things will boost your endorphins. 

• Smile. Put a pencil in your mouth so that your face has to smile. There is evidence that forcing the face muscles to smile actually causes real smiles and changes your mood to be more positive. There’s science behind it.️

• Pay attention to your inputs: music, shows, books, people. Choose positive and encouraging inputs. Don’t feed yourself with negativity and expect to get anything but negative results. Look for it and add to it. Unfollow accounts that are negative or snarky.  They might be funny in the moment but they bring you down in subtle ways.

• Most importantly: pray without ceasing. Pray about everything. God is with you always. God loves you!  Read the Bible and get to know him better. 

If you need help

If you feel like you might harm yourself or others, get help. There is no shame in that. Call a hotline, tell a friend or your husband, your medical provider, just get help. Your kids need you, the world needs what you have to offer. There are hormones that can become unbalanced and addressing that issue can make all the difference.  You might need to address issues in your past that are affecting you and your ability to parent right now, talk to a professional counselor about it. Ask God for wisdom in how to seek help.

You can regain enjoyment of your children. 

There is nothing like a mother’s love.  The Mama Bear effect is real.  Tap into that Mama Bear within and work on creating a beautiful life for you and your children.  Seek out inspirational activities that will build connection, involve your children in your work, do fun activities with them, and explore the world with them. You can learn how to enjoy your children again. Look for the joy, ask God to show it to you.  You can do it. 

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How is Home Management Plain and Simple different from your first book Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family?

Short Story:

Here’s the short story of Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family

• The new and improved edition, Home Management Plain and Simple is different in that I added content because I had several years more experience in home management by the time Home Management Plain and Simple was published.
• I removed content that is more appropriate for a forthcoming companion workbook.
• I edited it several times myself and had two other editors help me with the content.
• My editing goal was to write more broadly because people other than large families have benefited from the original.
• I wrote for everyone with a home.  If you don’t have children, skip those parts.
• I added personal stories for each chapter.
• I worked to make it sound more like me in real life.
• I inserted lots of grace.  Because life is all grace.

My goal with Home Management Plain and Simple was for you to get the principles and take them as a springboard to use in your life.  The meat and bones of the LFL are in Home Management Plain and Simple but there is more heart, soul, and grace in it.

Long Story

Here’s the long story of Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family

The blog: Large Family Logistics

The first book developed out of years of blog writing back in 2004 through 2007.  I was swimming in little children, middle sized children and teenagers, nine total. Home, homeschooling, farming, wrestling, gardening, sewing, food food and more food, laundry, bathrooms, floors…  It was the deep end of the pool and I was treading water like crazy.  I learned and I wrote about what I learned.

Babies get up early and nearly every morning I’d drink my coffee, nurse the baby in my desk chair and write a new blogpost one-handed.  I’m pretty good at typing one-handed with both my right and left hand because of those days.

I wrote about

• what I was doing and why I was doing it
• how to do different tasks and how to move faster
• about pregnancy and babies
• life with preschoolers
• reading aloud
• homeschooling a bunch of different ages of kids at once
• our farm life
• and how I survived by praying without ceasing amongst other stress management techniques

Blogwriting was a combination of creative outlet and stress relief, and most of all a record for my children so that they wouldn’t struggle as much as I did in learning how to manage a home full of children.

I enjoyed my days because I was intentional at creating a happy and pleasant home.  That certainly does not mean that all the days were sunshine and roses but I remember more good days than bad.  At first it was scary to hit the publish button but then I started getting a lot of feedback from other moms who were swimming in children and trying to manage their homes.  They wrote thank you notes and asked questions about how I handled certain situation or tasks.  They encouraged me to keep writing.  I kept writing.

For awhile I had an online store for products that I found helpful and weren’t widely available (Amazon didn’t have everything back then).  This was fun and fed my entrepreneur side.  I’m pretty sure I didn’t make any money, though I did learn a lot.

The book: Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family

Then, we had our micro-preemie in 2007 and my focus shifted to giving him a healthy start.  I closed the store, rarely wrote blog posts, had more tea parties with my children, and turned my writing towards putting all the blog posts into a book.  My blog was named Large Family Logistics and for the book I added the tagline The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family.  In 2010 it was published by a now defunct company.

At the same time that the book was undergoing the editing process by the publisher, our family was in the midst of a start-up business on our farm, a micro-dairy making goat cheese.

Our whole family worked hard on the goat dairy, from the college student back for summer break who marketed cheese, the homeschooled kids milking goats and making cheese, to the preschoolers who slapped stickers onto cheese tubs.  We designed (with the state’s oversight) and built a goat dairy and cheese making facility.  The new business involved multiple meetings with the state, certificates, understanding rules and regulations, perfecting the cheese flavor, trying out markets and deciding where to sell our goat cheese, ordering supplies for the best price, deciding on pricing, calculating and calculating again (Office Day was every day), and delegating the right family member for the right job.

My brain was goats, cheese, and business every day all day for the years that we were in production.  Everyone got an education in business and marketing!

Sooooo, when the publishing business (that I trusted) sent me edits to approve, I didn’t really look at the edits but just hit the key to accept over and over.  That was a really dumb move on my part.  Because, turns out, I didn’t fully understand the deeper philosophy of that business or how they were editing the book with a slant towards centering life around the patriarch (not that we shouldn’t honor husbands and fathers, like we honor everyone that we love and care about).

You know that quote from Princess Bride, “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”  That word in this situation is patriarchy.

Well, turns out that I was interpreting the word according to what I was living in reality.  I had never been to any of the company’s conferences or those put on by like-minded business cohorts.  I read books here and there around the edges of life and I read them interpreting them with my life lens.  My reality was that my husband and I are a team.  We make decisions together, united, based on what makes sense for the situation.

At that time, I didn’t know about the destructive underbelly of patriarchy. I thought patriarchy meant that fathers loved their families and were involved in their family life.

The book: Home Management Plain and Simple

I’ll gloss over some ugliness involving patriarchy here and get to 2015 when the original rights of the book Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family returned to me.  I didn’t have a lot of time to do the editing that I wanted to do because… life changed in many ways, we had moved off of our Iowa farm to rural Idaho for my husband’s off-farm career, I went to nursing school so that someday I can be a nurse-midwife… that’s another story that I’ll tell someday…

Once in a while I was able to get a few days to devote to working on the book.  The first time was August of 2015 when I went on a three-day work trip with my husband (he was working in wheat at that time), holed up in a hotel in Bozeman, Montana, read (for the first time) and edited Large Family Logistics.  I couldn’t do anything with the book again for a few months and that pattern carried on with edits and writing until I finally had to say, “Enough”, and Home Management Plain and Simple became available in 2017.

My goal is that Home Management, Plain and Simple will help people to have happy and pleasant home lives by tweaking the work at home to be more efficient, joyful, and freeing up time for other pursuits.

The Blog: Home Plain and Simple

I’m writing a bit more regularly now, life has settled down a bit and one of my daughters has joined me in managing the website, social media, and writing with me.  There are seasons in life but they aren’t quite as predictable as the regularity of spring, summer, fall, winter.  Follow along with blog content here as we write about our seasons of home and life.

Get the book, Home Management, Plain and Simple, here.

We are active on Instagram @homeplainandsimple, giving a peak into our daily life and doing Live videos. 

We also post how-to videos on YouTube. Subscribe to our channel!

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A Post By Bridgette

It’s a typical weekday morning when I wake up and throw my hair into a quick bun- often without doing more than running my fingers through it a few times! Halfway through the day I see myself in a mirror and kick myself for not doing SOMEthing with my hair.

While a simple bun or braid is an easy and effective hairdo for a busy woman, I often wish that I had the time, knowledge, or motivation to do something prettier with my hair. I’d all but given up on ever doing something different with my hair, when I was given the opportunity to try a few beautiful hair accessories by Lara Dobler. Lara sells Lilla Rose hair accessories- and let me tell you they are not just beautiful, but they are easy to use and comfortable.

Hair Accessories I’ve come to Love:

Flexi Clip

The flexi clip is a unique hair clip that serves a multitude of purposes and comes in various sizes for different hairstyles. From an updo, a half-up, or a simple ponytail- these clips dress up any hairstyle in a beautiful, easy and functional way. What I love about this clip is that it’s easy to use, yet feminine and gives you the satisfaction of having a beautiful hairdo with minimum time and effort. Perfect for busy moms!

Bobby Pins

Bobby pins are fairly self explanatory. It’s safe to say that most women have experience with these hair accessories. However, Lilla Rose bobby pins are exquisite and STRONG. When you put these babies in your hair they are not going to budge or wiggle their way out! I use mine when I feel like wearing my hair down, but don’t appreciate having hair in my face. I pull my hair back from my face, pin it in place and that’s where it stays!

The bobby pins I have are so pretty, anytime I wear them I instantly feel great about my hair. It almost feels like a shame to wear them too often. But that’s the point of having and wearing beautiful things right? To feel feminine and beautiful? Your day may be spent doing basic home management tasks and wrangling children and babies, but if something as simple as a hair clip and make your day a little more special… why not?

U Pins

The hair accessory that quickly became my favorite are the U pins. Like other Lilla Rose products they are simple and beautiful. I really can’t get over how beautiful these hair accessories are, it’s like wearing jewelry! I typically wear my hair in a bun, so when I received my U pins I instantly twisted my hair into a bun and began experimenting with the best ways to fix a bun in my hair with them.

After a few tries, I had it down. I’m fairly picky about how a bun sits on my head so I was pleasantly surprised when the U pins held my bun securely and comfortably! One note that I’ll make is that they will start to work themselves out if you go on an ATV ride around the county… But I’ll forgive them for that since I doubt they were made for being worn while being that active! I could easily see the U pins being my go-to daily hair accessory, adding flair and femininity to my usual boring bun.

Home Business

In addition to providing beautiful, quality hair products, Lilla Rose is a company that also provides the opportunity for individuals everywhere to start their own home business. Starting a home business is a great way for moms to be able to bring in additional income while still being home for the kids. Below are a few questions we had for Lara about running a home business with Lilla Rose, and the answers she provided.

Why did you choose the home business you did? Over all the other home businesses available?

I discovered Lilla Rose through a homeschool blog and never had any plans to start my own business. I’m an introvert, hate selling, and don’t care for the “salesman” type either.  ? However, I took a chance on the products and fell in love! I had to share, and took a chance on the business side of it. Little did I know I would fall in love with the company along the way.  

What’s your favorite part of your particular home business?

My favorite part of my business is that I get to help women with their hair issues.  I love it when they think nothing works in their hair, but walk away with a Flexi in their hair, feeling beautiful and put together.  I am the kind of girl that loves things to be simple, so if I can help others simplify their mornings by enabling them to throw their hair up in a quick updo with a Lilla Rose accessory; that looks classy, is comfortable and works in every type of hair, it makes my day.  If I can watch a bride go down the aisle with that little something extra in her and her bridesmaids hair, that just warms my heart. My true joy, and desire for my business is to help others.

What do you appreciate most about the company you work with?

I have been with Lilla Rose since May of 2011, and what I have come to love most about the company is the family atmosphere and support not only from the other Stylists, but the CEO and founder.  The business was started by a family, and they continue to grow and outdo themselves in giving to the Stylists to help them succeed in their individual businesses. One thing I appreciate is the way you can do as much or as little, how I can pick up after a month or year break because of ‘life’.  Another bonus is the way the Stylists are out to help each other with their different styles and personalities, and the way I’ve never felt in competition with anyone but myself. I love the various ways to sell for different types of personalities and budgets.

The business is not a faith-based business, but I have found that many of the Stylists have that in common, and I think that adds to the family like atmosphere and support.  I also love that the requirements for the business are pretty relaxed. There are rules, as there should be, but the requirements to start and maintain your business are extremely minimal. One of the things I looked for as a personal requirement in the business was not having to carry any inventory if I didn’t want to, and Lilla Rose doesn’t require that at all. Finally, I love that #1 in their code of ethics is: I will make the Golden Rule my basic principle for doing business at all times.  

How many hours a week do you work on your business and what do you do in those hours?

I would say right now I average 5-12 hours a week working on the business at home, however every day that I go out wearing my Lilla Rose hair accessories I am “working.”  People will stop me and ask about them, so I’m always working in that sense. However, actual “business” in the “office” is just a few hours a week. It varies though if I am doing a Live Sale or have people wanting a “Style Up” in their home or online, then some weeks and months are busier than others.  I love how I can make it work for my life and around our family’s schedule.

Do you have any advice for another mom considering a home business and how that fits into life?

For anyone considering a home business, I am a full supporter of getting out of the traditional workplace and coming home.  Direct sales have not always gotten a great report in years past, but there are a few out there that are honest, good and truly support the family.  That is what I love. My faith and family comes first for me, so when you find something you love and want to share it with others, get your kids involved, and teaching them great life skills and spending time together- it is a win-win.   

My advice for anyone looking or thinking of starting a home business: find something you love, include your family if you can, be realistic with your goals and how much time you want or need to invest to make it worth your while. Direct sales is just one avenue but for me it has been a great and life changing business.

In Conclusion:

I’ve come to love the way I can easily fix my hair and feel pretty about a simple updo with these beautiful hair accessories. I’d like to say thank you to Lara for sharing her perspective, and giving me the opportunity to try Lilla Rose hair accessories. I encourage you to look into these, and if starting a home business is something you’ve been contemplating, maybe Lilla Rose is a company that could be a fit for you!

If you’re curious about Lilla Rose products or starting a home business, check out Lara’s website or Lilla Rose page!

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The 24/7 daily life of being a mom can be a lot of stress to manage.  Schedules, food, laundry, and cleaning- just for starters. Moms have a lot on their plate, and home management skills can help to relieve the stress of mess, clutter, and an unorganized life. 

In Home Management, Plain and Simple I write about managing home life to make it more enjoyable. Working through the book and implementing home management strategies can make a difference in your everyday life to reduce stress. 

For today, I’ve put together a few simple steps you can add to your life, one baby step at a time.  I do these steps daily. Managing stress has to be simple because life can be busy and complicated, even when we deliberately try to slow it down.  

1. Acknowledge Your Stress

Stress is a daily part of life for moms. The first step to managing stress is to acknowledge the fact that it’s real. Pretending it’s not there won’t help! There are different types of stress that may impact us in different ways.

There’s good stress, which pushes us to improvement such as when we set a goal and take steps to reach that goal.  Stress isn’t always a negative thing. For example, a stressful task after being done fifteen times is much easier the fifteenth time than the first. Stress in small doses followed by recovery time, makes us more able to handle the next stressor. Mastering moderate stress can be a learned skill.  For real, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”  Grab some hope here!

There’s also negative stress; the kind of stress that comes from adverse life events. Or stress that comes from a series of moderate stressors in a short period of time.  This is the kind of stress that makes us feel sick and can affect our physical and mental health.  What you feel is real and you may need to acknowledge that you’ve experienced something traumatic and talk to someone professional about it. There’s no shame in that.

Stress is viewed subjectively. Things that may cause me stress may not cause you stress, or we can interpret stress in varying degrees.  This is why we must be kind and gracious with each other and ourselves. There are millions of factors that cause us all to see the world through different eyes.

So today, acknowledge the stressor of the moment.  Say it aloud to yourself, write it down, or tell someone.  Stress is a daily part of life, acknowledge its presence.

2. Write Your Mom Stress

Get a piece of paper to write your stressors on.  My favorite everyday plain paper I use is a yellow legal pad because I can buy it anywhere, and it’s yellow so I don’t lose it.  Today, every single time you feel your stress level rising, your jaw tighten, teeth clench, stomach jitters, your voice raise in irritation, a compulsion to go back to bed, reach for a drink, have a smoke, eat some food, look at social media, whatever it is that soothes your angst; write down what is going on in your home or your thoughts and your physical symptom.  It helps to simply identify the trigger for the stress. The types of mom stress is going to be different for each one of us. Once the stress is identified, then you can do something constructive about it. Learn how to manage the stressor and your reaction in a healthy way.

Some of your tactics for managing stress are probably fine and healthy, and likely some are harmful to you and/or those around you.  That’s why it’s important to write and think through what stresses you out and how you’re currently coping with the stressors. You want to think about the best ways to reduce your stress, to manage and master daily stressors.  It’s tricky because life is constantly changing and bringing us new challenges. It’s valuable to learn healthy stress management techniques that work for you.

If you want to journal about your stress for fifteen minutes, then go for it!  But when you’re a busy mom, finding fifteen minutes for journaling can be hit-or-miss. That’s why I suggest just writing a few words about what the stressor is and how you feel.  It’s do-able. Then, you can think about how to manage your daily mom stress.

3. Be Grateful, Give Thanks

You’ve probably heard it a million times, but that’s because gratefulness works for managing stress.  You can keep a gratitude journal on  paper, on the computer, or with an app on your phone.  It doesn’t have to be complicated. I know you’re busy so keep it simple.  If you use your phone, give yourself reminders throughout the day. Even if you don’t get it written, the reminder causes a pause and makes you conscious of the act of living gratefully.

Write your thanks in the morning when you’re starting your day, or do it at night as part of your bedtime routine. You could even do both.  Teach gratefulness to your kids at breakfast, keep a group journal. How about a photo journal of gratefulness?

Say “Thank you” as part of your daily vocabulary when you interact with people.  “Thank you for your time,” “Thank you for your patience,” “Thank you for your help,” “Thank you for serving”—give your thanks away to bless those around you!

4. Spend Time Outdoors

The evidence that going outside into nature is having big benefits for mental and physical health keeps building.  I think it’s fascinating! Even having houseplants or window views is beneficial. As a busy mom, how do you do that?  I love houseplants, but when my children were little I couldn’t keep them alive. I was too busy feeding and watering humans!  I did better with vegetable gardening because… rain.

A few simple ideas for getting outside into nature to manage stress are:  go for a walk with or without your children, play with your children in the yard or at a park, plant a flower or vegetable garden to get you outside daily, explore your local parks and conservation areas, take up running or biking, play in the snow with your children, walk beside water, or just sit outside on your front step and watch the sky.

Simple ideas for appreciating the outdoors during the winter or on rainy days: houseplants, leave your curtains open, plant a tree or garden to be viewed from your windows, hang birdfeeders, place a favorite comfy chair beside a window with the best outdoor view, or go outside despite the weather.

5. Do Something for Your Health

A whole book could be written about health effects on our lives, we know these things.  However it can be overwhelming to think about making dramatic life changes. Lasting change happens with small things done daily.  I suggest that once daily, put some deliberate action into making a healthy choice in food and drink. There are all kinds of diet opinions; to keep it simple for your daily stress management, stick to adding one healthy choice and then do it daily for a few weeks.  That one action will get the ball rolling towards making other healthy choices.

A few simple ideas of healthy food and drink choices for today: cut a lemon into a pitcher of water and sip it all day, look up a list of anti-oxidant foods and eat one each day, eat leafy greens, eat a handful of nuts for one of your snacks, eat fish, eat eggs, add a colorful fruit or vegetable to your family meal.

Simple ideas for adding exercise today: go for a walk, do a yoga video from YouTube, do ten jumping-jacks, play outside with your children, go for a bike ride, swim with your children, garden.

Managing Daily Mom Stress

There are many other items we could add to this list but for the sake of simplicity, start with the basics.  Give your stress acknowledgment and thought, then move onto simple do-able solutions. Moms, work on managing your daily stress, don’t suffer and don’t let it grow.  

Hey mama, if better home management will help ease your daily stress, take a look at the worksheets in the Free Resource Library or get the book Home Management, Plain and Simple.  I’ve got nine kids, four still at home.  I’ve had many years of swimming in babies, toddlers, preschoolers… and years of four teenagers at a time… yeah, I did that.  I’m still doing it. And I’m here to tell you that I not only survived, we’ve had a lot of fun! It is figure-out-able.

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